I was at a shiur recently and the rabbi speaking said over an interesting story which I would like to share with you.
A girl was dating a fine boy nothing extraordinary but a all around solid boy. Middos, good learner . However , on a date I'm guessing not so far along as you will soon see they were driving somewhere. The boy was not familiar with the area as well as the girl so he told her where they will be heading.
Very nice and much appreciated as to give the girl a heads up and the opportunity to voice her opinion if she'd rather not go to that specific place.
As they headed to their destination he started taking a route which wasn't the quickest, in fact it was headed in the opposite direction . Remember she has lived there her entire life she definitely knows the best way to get to the destination.
So she very politely suggested an alternate route, the correct route.
Their was no reply from the boy just silence.
He continued on his way...after driving for a while realized he had gone in the wrong direction, turned around and corrected his mistake.
ALL WITHOUT SAYING A WORD.
The rabbi then proceeded to tell this girl to run run far away from this boy. If he can't communicate in such small things as messing up in driving directions to someone who is obviously more educated than him in that area there are definitely more areas which he will not be able to communicate in.
There are some points I would like to discuss with other people who were not present at the shiur (as I already discussed them with the people I went to the shiur with): 🙁
1-Aren't all men/boys like that with driving and directions? if so what is the big deal? who says when a real scenario comes up he will be silent and not take action?
2-Maybe he was totally mortified that he made such a terrible mistake and was so embarrassed he didn't know what to say? Dan Lkaf Zchus?
3-We do not know exactly how the girl said what she said maybe he felt defensive and didn't want to create an awkward moment for both of them and so he just kept quiet? "Silence is golden"
4-Since when do we girls speak up on a date in giving directions? I have never given help to the boy with driving and directions just like I don't help him plan the dates that is his"job". Maybe the boy should run far far away.
Anyway, I'm so sorry that I went off like that but being "in shidduchim" for a bit of time and really living through it, sometimes get's hard and when you hear these these stories and their lessons while they themselves never went through the same "dating scene" as us just gets me thinking and I would love to know if what I'm writing is way off or way on.
[i][/i]K.I.T. 🙁 😀