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Author Topic: How long??
laykay

Dating Maven

Posts: 96
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Post How long??
on: August 27, 2013, 7:44 AM

How long since your last date???
Me: 7 months and counting

Wanted to take a poll and see if girls really not getting dates or something is up. I might add that I did get 3 yeses but they were completely off the mark and not for me!

Princess-
Lea

Dating Pro

Posts: 223
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Post Re: How long??
on: August 27, 2013, 9:50 AM

Me and my sister had that (she's been married for 16 years). Sometimes when it comes to dating there can be a really long dry spell. My last one was nearly a year; my sister also had a year-long one. Keep in mind that when I do have somewhat regular dates, they were often really bad. Quantity is not quality!

hittheroof

Dater

Posts: 39
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Post Re: How long??
on: August 27, 2013, 11:31 AM

3 months! Feels like years ago!!!

far rock-
gal

Dater

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Post Re: How long??
on: August 27, 2013, 12:40 PM

3 months ago. And the one before that was a year ago. Its worse tho when u are with other ppl who u know date alot and they are complaining to you either that "shidduchim are so hard!" Or that "its been so long!" (and its been 3 weeks) uch!!! I get so frustrated!!

imyirtzeha-
shembyu

Dater

Posts: 46
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Post Re: How long??
on: August 28, 2013, 10:55 PM

almost 7 months 🙁
had, I think, 4 yeses in between but they were all either way off or with such complicated messed up family situations that it was not shayach

not-
nogeiah-
who

Dating Maven

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Post Re: How long??
on: August 29, 2013, 9:35 PM

i so agree with you, far rock gal...
i'm 22 and never got a single date... 🙁

chaykie

Dating Coach

Posts: 466
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Post Re: How long??
on: August 29, 2013, 10:24 PM

are you serious nnw?? that's crazy! what are you looking for?? maybe i can think of someone! I'm so sorry to hear that, it must be so hard for you 🙁 i have a friend in the same sitch actually... and all you others, i so understand you cuz i also have long waits bt dates sometimes. i find that usually the dating comes in twos or threes and then you have like a long time till the next two or three. they come in groups so you get excited, then you wait...then it starts again.

musicalsea-
rch

Dater

Posts: 12
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 1, 2013, 6:10 PM

I never post on sites like this, but I think this is so important that I actually signed up just for this post.

I did not get a single date until I was almost 23 and at the time I was a little nervous. I was busy with school at the time and when I wasn't studying or at work, I made sure that I was busy so I wouldn't get all depressed. Now that I have finally gone out a few times, I feel that I am no way 'better off' than I was before. I came to realize that just because someone goes out more often, it doesn't mean that they're any closer to finding their bashert than someone who doesn't.

On a related note, R' Haur in Baltimore has a line that I have lived by ever since he taught me almost 5 years ago, and it has made every decision I've made so much easier- "Don't be a waiter just because you're a dater." Live your life for now, and don't put your life on hold just because you may get engaged and it'll mess everything up. So don't put off cutting your hair short, going to a shabbaton or even applying to college! If you do get engaged, you'll deal with sorting everything out then.

This has given me such clarity and strength to go on, you can't imagine.
Hatzlacha with everything and never forget, we're all rooting for you.

sara hi

Dater

Posts: 18
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 1, 2013, 6:25 PM

One year and three months. Ppl said yes and am so not picky but they were seriously not shayach. Anyone else as long as me?

sara hi

Dater

Posts: 18
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 1, 2013, 6:25 PM

One year and three months. Ppl said yes and am so not picky but they were seriously not shayach. Anyone else as long as me?

dazzleme21

Dating Maven

Posts: 133
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 2:28 AM

I know someone who didnt get a date until she was 22 . At 22 she finally got a date and thats the boy she married!

dazzleme21

Dating Maven

Posts: 133
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 2:29 AM

what would you rather date fewer till you get the right one or date alot to get to the right one?.Dates are not neccessarily fun with the wrong guy. 🙁

PurplePrin-
cess

Dating Maven

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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 12:39 PM

I believe in less dates, few and far between, rather than a bunch. I wouldn't want to see boys one after the other just for entertainment purposes and to not feel "unwanted". The first boy I saw was at age 19, and then I saw someone at 23, then someone at 24, and then the guy who is now my husband at 24 1/2. I had no problem with the wait. I didn't feel that nobody wanted me because I did get suggestions all the time, but just nothing relevant to me. I'm glad I wasn't jaded by dating and besides who's interesting in so many frustrations?

PurplePrin-
cess

Dating Maven

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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 12:42 PM

Btw, I know of quite a few Chassidish boys (middle of the road, not extreme chassidish) who are in the 24-30 age group, some in kollel, some working. If any of you are looking for a boy like that, please let me know! I would love to redt something to you.

imyirtzeha-
shembyu

Dater

Posts: 46
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 1:32 PM

purpleprincess...didnt realize you were married!
is there anyone else on here that is married?

PurplePrin-
cess

Dating Maven

Posts: 112
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 1:32 PM

Quote from imyirtzehashembyu on September 2, 2013, 1:32 PM
purpleprincess...didnt realize you were married!
is there anyone else on here that is married?

Just recently!

imyirtzeha-
shembyu

Dater

Posts: 46
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 2, 2013, 1:34 PM

mazel tov!
imh by the rest of us soon

dazzleme21

Dating Maven

Posts: 133
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 4, 2013, 12:27 AM

purple princess how recently is recent ?? a few months or weeks? just curious 😉

dazzleme21

Dating Maven

Posts: 133
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 4, 2013, 12:27 AM

amen kyh!! to imyirtzehashembyu

PurplePrin-
cess

Dating Maven

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Post Re: How long??
on: September 4, 2013, 1:34 AM

Few months is more like it.

daysfan24

Dating Maven

Posts: 134
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Post Re: How long??
on: September 9, 2013, 4:58 PM

Almost 2 months, like others said, it really does feel like years. I definitely feel the pain of others who have longer 🙁

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