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Author Topic: Erev Shabbos
market

Dater

Posts: 22
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Post Erev Shabbos
on: June 6, 2013, 9:34 AM

Would you not go out on erev Shabbos cuz you may feel under too much pressure being close to Shabbos?

feigy123

Dating Coach

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 6, 2013, 9:40 AM

Why would you feel under pressure? He'll make sure to get you back before shabbos, and then you also will get the day off from helping

rosepetal5

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 6, 2013, 10:17 AM

I can understand why you might feel that way. For me, Erev Shabbos is all about getting ready for Shabbos. I have a hard time concentrating on other things, unless I have to. But it's up to you and how you feel.

in the gap

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 6, 2013, 11:59 AM

It depends why he wants to, but I think if it is because he doesn't want to miss learning, then go for it

inshidduch-
im613

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 6, 2013, 12:29 PM

I once had the opposite problem-we went out on an erev shabbos and the boy was in so much pressure to get back before shabbos cuz it was an early shabbos that it just wasn't such a good date...
but it doesnt usually make a difference especially now, when shabbos starts late, and there really is plenty of time that you don't need to feel pressured.

basmelech

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 6, 2013, 1:33 PM

Quote from inshidduchim613 on June 6, 2013, 12:29 PM
but it doesnt usually make a difference especially now, when shabbos starts late, and there really is plenty of time that you don't need to feel pressured.

Agree with insh613. 🙂

chaykie

Dating Coach

Posts: 466
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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 9:59 AM

if ya think about it, you usually shower and do ur makeup and hair before a date, so that's 3 things out of the way by the time you get home! and if it was still one of ur first dates, ur probably wearing shabbos clothes, so that's another thing!

feigy123

Dating Coach

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 10:02 AM

Also, he can't drop you off too late, since he also needs to drive home before he gets ready for shabbos.

patcha

Dating Coach

Posts: 445
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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 1:20 PM

He's the one going to the trouble to arrange a date, so he gets to decide when you go out, barring major events.

basmelech

Dating Coach

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 2:29 PM

Quote from patcha on June 10, 2013, 1:20 PM
He's the one going to the trouble to arrange a date, so he gets to decide when you go out, barring major events.

I think that it should be an agreement between the two. If its really inconvenient for one, it should be rearranged. The boy shouldnt have the final decision just because he arranged it.

feigy123

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 2:33 PM

I think both of your interests in the time should be relatively even.

But it is hard to start listing out all your interests and weighing them.

patcha

Dating Coach

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 4:33 PM

We are all making the same point here, just stating it differently.
It should be an agreement, and weighing interests is difficult. So whoever plans the date should plan it and the other person gets to speak up.
By major events I meant like work commitments etc but I get how that could be misread. I don't mean that you should only ask to reschedule if there's a birth or death in the family.

feigy123

Dating Coach

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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 4:34 PM

But you do agree that you should ask to reschedule if there is a birth or death in the family, or even if your sister gets married that night. Right?

patcha

Dating Coach

Posts: 445
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Post Re: Erev Shabbos
on: June 10, 2013, 4:40 PM

Right. 🙂

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