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Author Topic: Dropping the Shadchan
Liba

Dater

Posts: 20
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Post Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 7, 2013, 4:24 PM

Do you think it's important to drop the shadchan after a while? Do you find that it brings you closer? Do you find like it brings you to close? Any opinions would be appreciated.
Thanks

atararox

Dating Pro

Posts: 227
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 7, 2013, 5:08 PM

i dont know if it brings you two closer but it is an impt step. it says that you have reached the point in the relationship where you can both discuss how you feel openly to eachothers faces....just keep in mind, once you drop the shadchan, if one of you wants to end it then you gatta do it in person to their face. where as if you ddint drop the shachan you can have the shadchan break up for you...but thats just my opinion.

feigy123

Dating Coach

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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 7, 2013, 6:49 PM

I can't fathom getting engaged to someone without it.

Liba

Dater

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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 7, 2013, 8:06 PM

Does anyone else here feel like dating just moves to quickly? If you have a decent time for 5 dates suddenly everyone is thinking about you getting engaged!?

gold

Dating Maven

Posts: 77
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 7, 2013, 11:46 PM

Yeah, I agree....like tell the peanut gallery (siblings, aunts, uncles, and cousins) to chill...

life123

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Posts: 324
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 7, 2013, 11:53 PM

Huh, always tell the peanut gallery to chill... I haven't actually dated yet, and every time one of my siblings who is in school out of town call/visits, they go, "So, have you gone on a date yet? No? Why not? What's taking you so long already?"

feigy123

Dating Coach

Posts: 553
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 8, 2013, 8:14 AM

I prefer to not even tell the peanut gallery anything at all. I'll send them all a text when I get engaged.

inshidduch-
im613

Dating Maven

Posts: 155
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 8, 2013, 6:56 PM

So true! Like after any date, all my younger siblings already think i'm getting engaged and start planning the wedding lol

Liba

Dater

Posts: 20
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 9, 2013, 10:41 PM

I didn't mean necessarily from the peanut gallery (although that can also be quite annoying) It's just that at the time when I say I will go out again it doesn't seem like it I'm making such a big statement, It's kind of like why not it went OK so I'll go out again, then before I know it I've gone out on 5 dates and it's like I am making a statement to the guy to the shadchan and to my parents ect. that I am very serious about this. When really I'm not I was just kind of taking my time to see how things develop. Can anyone relate?

atararox

Dating Pro

Posts: 227
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Post Re: Dropping the Shadchan
on: March 9, 2013, 11:36 PM

not really bracha. usually after 3 times its no longer just about seeing how it delevops. after a 3rd date it usualluy means you like the guy and if things continue the way they are you can see it going somewhere or it def has patential (more than ok hes nice..lets see if it can go furthur)

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