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Author Topic: Chasidish?
Bracha613

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Post Chasidish?
on: June 9, 2013, 7:22 PM

What do you all think of a regular Ashkanazi girl going out with a chasidish or heimish a boy?

patcha

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 9, 2013, 8:38 PM

I think it is a terrible idea.

Bracha613

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 9, 2013, 9:39 PM

Quote from patcha on June 9, 2013, 8:38 PM
I think it is a terrible idea.

Why?

patcha

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 9, 2013, 10:57 PM

I'm joking. Isn't heimish/chassidish a subset of Ashkenazic, generally speaking?

feigy123

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 9, 2013, 11:13 PM

Quote from patcha on June 9, 2013, 10:57 PM
I'm joking. Isn't heimish/chassidish a subset of Ashkenazic, generally speaking?

Ok, what do you think about a litvish girl marrying a chassidish boy?

patcha

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 8:58 AM

I think it is a personal decision and little is accomplished by generalizing about it on internet fora. 🙂

Generally speaking though, it sounds great in theory, until you realize the baggage that comes with marrying Chassidish and buying into that lifestyle. It is a far more restrictive lifestyle and community than most Litvish/yeshivish girls will really be able to tolerate.

chaykie

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 9:30 AM

Bracha613, there is absolutely nothing wrong with a regular (i think the word you were looking for was litvish, not ashkenazi, as chassidim and heimish ppl are ashkenazi, generally, but they are not litvish) litvish girl going out with a chassidish/ heimish boy. The question is, is the girl willing to change her lifestyle (even if not drastically)? Like patcha said, it's a personal decision. Some litvish girls will agree to marry chassidish/heimish boys, some won't. and just for the record, I'm chassidish, and I don't want a chassidish or heimish boy. I've been out with both types (actually, only one boy out of 5 i went out with was litvish) and i realized it's totally not what i want. So it's a very personal thing.

Bracha613

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 9:39 AM

Can you explin what's the difference? What didn't you like?
I'm also having a hard time understanding what exactly Hiemish is?
Is it like just the Chitzonios not the Pnimious?

Princess-
Lea

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 10:24 AM

Chassdish is not the same as heimish.

Chassidish is what it is: belonging to a specific sect, Bobov, Stalin, Satmar, etc. Heimish is less definitive. Contrary to popular belief, not all Jews were chassidish back in Europe, but Yiddish was their mama loshon. They do not hold by chassidish ideals or the lifestyle, but just sound like them conversationally. (That's like my family. Despite the fact that my grandfather was clean shaven before the war, my father is constantly accused of abandoning his imaginary chassidish background).

Now, is this boy in question chassidish? Does he wear the getup? Plan on a streimel?

Or is he heimish? Meaning he can be clean-shaven and black-hatted, without any chassidus in his lineage?

Big difference.

patcha

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 1:26 PM

Bracha613:

Is it like just the Chitzonios not the Pnimious?

What kind of question is that? No one is going to say that their life is about Chitzonius. Except for the sake of argument.

Bracha613

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 4:15 PM

I meant the Chiotzonious part of Chasidish! Not in yidishkeit!

Princess-
Lea

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 4:19 PM

Meaning levush?

To clarify, there are no "regular" Ashkenazim. If chassidus is something really alien to a person, it is their choice if they want to go out or not. But stranger marriages have happened.

Sari

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 6:59 PM

Quote from Bracha613 on June 10, 2013, 9:39 AM
I'm also having a hard time understanding what exactly Hiemish is?

I'm not taking responsibility for this but a hiemish a friend told me
Heimish to Chasidish
is like
Reform to Orthodox
it's just the feal of the real thing but they don't do any of the details that really matter.
Obviously everyone is different, just thought i'd share.

basmelech

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 8:22 PM

I really dont like this at all. Really not nice. I really do not like when people classify everyone in one boat. Heimish is a family type that is not chasidish and isnt a chassid of a particular rebbi. There are many yerei shamayim that are heimish and very special people. Every group can have people who do aveiros chas veshalom, and mitzvos. Its each individual alone who will give a din vecheshban not which group he belonged to.

chaykie

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 9:15 PM

i do not agree with that at all sari! that's a bad analogy.

Sari

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 10, 2013, 11:20 PM

Quote from basmelech on June 10, 2013, 8:22 PM
There are many yerei shamayim that are heimish and very special people. Every group can have people who do aveiros chas veshalom, and mitzvos. Its each individual alone who will give a din vecheshban not which group he belonged to.

I didn't say anything about aveiros???? I was talking about how Chasidish they are. That they do the stuff that gives it a chasidish "feel". I don't think there's anything wrong with that. Do you?

Princess-
Lea

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 9:55 AM

Quote from Sari on June 10, 2013, 6:59 PM

Quote from Bracha613 on June 10, 2013, 9:39 AM
I'm also having a hard time understanding what exactly Hiemish is?

I'm not taking responsibility for this but a hiemish a friend told me
Heimish to Chasidish
is like
Reform to Orthodox
it's just the feal of the real thing but they don't do any of the details that really matter.
Obviously everyone is different, just thought i'd share.

Sari, as I explained above NOT EVERYONE IN EUROPE WAS CHASSIDISH. But, Yiddish was still the language of choice, and the regional dialect was the same between the non-Chassidish and the Chassidish.

For instance, my family is heimish. Chassidus is not in my family tree. My grandfathers never davened in the chassidish shtibels in Europe. Their mindset was not REMOTELY chassidish. Heimish is a classification that is dying out, some choosing to associate with chassidus or with yeshivish. But they don't necessarily have any chassidish origins.

And yeah, that is a REALLY bad analogy, never mind not being at all accurate.

feigy123

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 10:18 AM

PrincessLea: Nobody thinks that in Europe everyone was chassidish. Nobody.

in the gap

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 11:25 AM

Heimish, just like all the other terms that are used today, doesn't have an exact definition. Often, but not always it is a family that has some Chassidish roots, and therefore keep some of the minhagim. Every person, though, is different, so making such wide generalisations is probably not a good idea.

Princess-
Lea

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 11:55 AM

Quote from feigy123 on June 11, 2013, 10:18 AM
PrincessLea: Nobody thinks that in Europe everyone was chassidish. Nobody.

Now who's making generalizations?

I have met enough people who think if one speaks a heimishe Yiddish, they think one is automatically chassidish or chassidish in origin. The type of Yiddish one speaks is based on region, not on chassidish sect. Stalin and Lubavitch speak a real Russian dialect of Yiddish, which is not remotely heimish.

My father is constantly being accused of being a lapsed Satmar chassid, despite the fact he has no chassidus in his bloodline. Satmar speaks a certain way because of the original location of the city of Satu Mare. My father's parents are from the same area, but neither were Satmar.

I am simply trying to clarify matters, that

a) Heimish does not automatically equal chassidish

b) generalizations are meaningless

c) just go out and find out what sort of person he is first hand. A lot simpler than anything else.

feigy123

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 12:25 PM

Sorry, I was being obnoxious.

I was just taken aback at how you were defending the notion of being litvish, as if it was under attack by people who think everyone in europe was chassidish, when I am not aware anyone has ever made that claim.

I don't know anything about accents and dialects, but if someone comes from an area that was very chassidish, I'd also tend to assume they were chassidish.

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Lea

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 2:25 PM

AAAAAAAAH!

Because I"M NOT LITVISH EITHER!

OK, deep breaths. Heee, haaaa . . .

Let's play a little game of Jewish geography, OK?

Litvish = Lithuania, a specific area of Russia. Not heimish at all. Different region completely.

Now, chassidus: Invented in the 1700s. Took time to spread. Meaning, the dialect predated chassidus.

Chassidus originated in Ukraine/Poland (moving borders over the years), so there was more of a chassidish influence there. So the heimish from there will sometimes have chassdish accoutrements: a bekechel, maybe a gartel, perhaps peyos behind the ear.

Now, let us move on to Hungary. Hungarian Jewry divided into two primary areas: Oberland, which allied itself with Austria, having a Vein/quasi-Yekkish outlook; and Interland, which while did contain some chassidim (not many, since the chassidus never spread in Hungary the way it did in Poland), also had these others (like my family) who are NEITHER chassidish or litvish (how could they be litvish? To be a litvak, one has to be from Lithuania originally).

Now, these individuals still exist in Jewish communities outside of the US, but here groups tend to identify with strictly 1) chassdish 2) yeshivish.

But there are other groups besides these two! Albeit an endangered species.

feigy123

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 2:39 PM

whatever, who cares. Call yourself whatever you want.

basmelech

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 2:47 PM

[b]Quote from Princess Lea on June 11, 2013, 11:55
I am simply trying to clarify matters, that

a) Heimish does not automatically equal chassidish

b) generalizations are meaningless

c) just go out and find out what sort of person he is first hand. A lot simpler than anything else.

Good job princesslea 🙂

iThink

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 11, 2013, 7:39 PM

lol, PrincessLea, never again will I make the mistake of assuming that the guy with the tie who just ordered ah feineh teler choooolent (mit kishke) is a Yoely at heart. I stand corrected. And enlightened. 🙂

smile19

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 23, 2013, 3:15 AM

Oky read all the comments wow oky totally different question I'm chasidish I just got read to a boy who is same like me..... Oky here gos my concern I grew up out of town and went to bais Yakov I don't no Yiddish so weel. Eny way this boy is 21 works and I heard he is not so smart... I'm the type of girl thts very lively and put together easy going chilled and regular do u think these are red flags I'm actly excited to go out w him cuz seems like he waz thrilled about wht he heard abt me one other thing I think his parents are more intens they want him to Bisho

patcha

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Post Re: Chasidish?
on: June 24, 2013, 9:55 AM

Quote from smile19 on June 23, 2013, 3:15 AM
Oky read all the comments wow oky totally different question I'm chasidish I just got read to a boy who is same like me..... Oky here gos my concern I grew up out of town and went to bais Yakov I don't no Yiddish so weel. Eny way this boy is 21 works and I heard he is not so smart... I'm the type of girl thts very lively and put together easy going chilled and regular do u think these are red flags I'm actly excited to go out w him cuz seems like he waz thrilled about wht he heard abt me one other thing I think his parents are more intens they want him to Bisho

Hearing he is not so smart is not really a red flag. There are different types of intelligence.

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