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Author Topic: Am I Ready?!
stuckinthe-
muck

Dater

Posts: 3
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Post Am I Ready?!
on: August 8, 2013, 1:14 PM

I have been going out with a guy for about a month already. We went on 9 dates and its progressing. I think I like him but I am just REALLY scared to get married!!!! Marriage is a very scary thing and I dont know if I can do it. I know I for sure sound like a baby but its a real thing!! HELP!!!!!!! I wanna get married but I cant live with a guy lol 😕 😉

laykay

Dating Maven

Posts: 96
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: August 8, 2013, 2:47 PM

Can I ask how old u are?

Avigail

Dating Maven

Posts: 130
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: August 8, 2013, 5:15 PM

Quote from laykay on August 8, 2013, 2:47 PM
Can I ask how old u are?

I don't think that should matter it's scary no matter how old you are. I think you should keep on dating until you feel comfortable, share your feelings with him. Tell him you like him ect. you're just a little nervous and you need a little more time.

patcha

Dating Coach

Posts: 445
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: August 8, 2013, 8:55 PM

Talk to a mentor (who has expertise in this area and is significantly older than you, not just a married friend.)

stuckinthe-
muck

Dater

Posts: 3
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: August 11, 2013, 10:26 PM

Its growing on me a little more but I am still scared! I have spoken to a mentor and she is helping me. I think I just have to become comfortable with the idea of getting married. I have to continue going out until I am ready..

chaykie

Dating Coach

Posts: 466
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: August 12, 2013, 9:45 PM

stuckinthemuck, first thing you should keep remembering is that it's normal to feel scared. I'm sure you are not the only one out there who's scared. Marriage is a huge change, and changes can definitely be scary. Just remember that, cuz the worst thing to do to yourself is to tell yourself that feeling that way is not normal.

daysfan24

Dating Maven

Posts: 134
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: August 14, 2013, 12:39 PM

Glad to hear its growing on you and the progression is getting a little easier stuckinthmuck! I know for me, I get terrified of change and like chaykie said you are NOT the only one. I wish you much hatzlacha!!!!!!

bibliophil-
e02

Dating Maven

Posts: 134
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: September 24, 2013, 6:55 AM

If you started dating in the first place, you must have known where it was going to lead! At some point you decided you were ready to face the prospect of dating for marriage. Think back to how you felt when you started shidduchim, and how exciting it was. Is it scary? Of course! All exciting and wonderful and worthwhile things are scary. Give yourself a little more time; make sure it's the right thing. But ultimately you are going to have to make a decision. Much hatzlacha!

shaindy86

Dater

Posts: 5
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: October 13, 2013, 10:19 PM

I think everyone is scarred to some degree. Marriage is a big change. Just don't let the fear get hold of you. Take a day at a time and don't think too much into a future. It's going to be ok!!! I wish you lots of hatzlacha!!!

PurplePrin-
cess

Dating Maven

Posts: 112
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Post Re: Am I Ready?!
on: October 13, 2013, 11:20 PM

Just keep in mind that Hashem made the world in a way that people are supposed to get married! It's part of the order of the world. It's in the program for you. Marriage is a good thing for you! It definitely sounds scary because you never did it before and also because this is like 3/4 of your lifetime, while singlehood is usually only about 1/4 of your lifetime! It's normal to feel nervous, but just remember that this is a natural thing for you and it's been programmed into your system.

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