Forums

Suggest a New Forum Category

Welcome Guest 

Show/Hide Header

Welcome Guest, posting in this forum requires registration.

Pages: [1]
Author Topic: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!
atararox

Dating Pro

Posts: 227
Send Message
Post Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

I am a regular mainstream skinny, pretty, solid girl from a good family with no health issues B"H! My friends are getting constant calls about me from boys mothers, yet hardly anyone shows up!!!! i tried changing around my references cuz thought maybe that might be it. But nothing changed!! i seriously dont get dates! ...BUT all the boys i did go out with said YES to me after first date and i was always the one to say NO! Can anyone else relate? 🙁

meant2be

Dater

Posts: 20
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

I know what you mean, my friends also tell me when someone calls about me but then nothing comes of it. I am from miami so not too much options or guys here like NY and its hard to get my name out there to shadchunim plus boys r not interested in long distance even tho im willing to fly in. Network!!!!! make sure people know who u are and that u r looking. ask your friends what they answer ppl to the basic quest. maybe they are not accurately describing u so mothers get the wrong idea about u. I keep a pic on my resume- I wish I didnt have to, but guys want to no about the girls appearance. plus this saves me the trouble of having to find out after going on one date that he wasnt interested bec of my looks. Make sure your resume is well written and describes u and what u r looking for. Coming from someone who started dating at 23 (after finishing school), and living out of town, I know what u r going through. Its HARD but ih we will find our zivug when the time is right 😛

meant2be

Dater

Posts: 20
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

I know what you mean, my friends also tell me when someone calls about me but then nothing comes of it. I am from miami so not too much options or guys here like NY and its hard to get my name out there to shadchunim plus boys r not interested in long distance even tho im willing to fly in. Network!!!!! make sure people know who u are and that u r looking. ask your friends what they answer ppl to the basic quest. maybe they are not accurately describing u so mothers get the wrong idea about u. I keep a pic on my resume- I wish I didnt have to, but guys want to no about the girls appearance. plus this saves me the trouble of having to find out after going on one date that he wasnt interested bec of my looks. Make sure your resume is well written and describes u and what u r looking for. Coming from someone who started dating at 23 (after finishing school), and living out of town, I know what u r going through. Its HARD but ih we will find our zivug when the time is right 😛

atararox

Dating Pro

Posts: 227
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

Thanks!! I am from in town and I have a pic on my resume andi have spoken to my references about what shud be said. Bh I have been blessed with good looks which is most likely what gets the boys moms to look into me over other girls to begin with. But for some reason not many boys give a yes. I guess its all min hashamayim and hashem just wants my tefillos. Its just sosososo frustrating!!

Miriam

Dating Maven

Posts: 51
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

That is so strange..but what can you do? It was a very smart idea to change around your references but now what? What is it that they are hearing that is turning them off? You did the best that you can and it doesn't sound like there is anything else that you can do. So, now just be thankful that they said no from the start and you didn't even have to to begin to invest yourself by going out.

smile19

Dater

Posts: 31
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

Hi I'm new here I totally no how ur feeling. I have same problem it deffentlay a nesoin but the only thing tht could help is our tiflos:) we don't know why hashm dose things but its always. For the best! Good luck!!

thinkingBY-
girl

Dating Coach

Posts: 607
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

I can relate, atararox. It is very frustrating, but put it into perspective. The way I look at it is that Hashem is saving me from having to go out with all of these guys that are not my bashert. It might be painful to not get dates, but the heartache may be greater if I begin a relationship with someone that isn't supposed to work out. This way saves me a lot of time and emotional energy. Keep in mind that it doesn't mean that there is anything wrong with you if your references are getting calls, but you're not getting dates. Many times boys mothers look into a lot of girls at once and then choose the one that sounds the best. Just because they didn't pick you, means nothing! Maybe you give a different impression to people than what you're looking for, and people are redting you to guys that aren't ballpark. There can be a lot of reasons why people get calls about you, but things don't pan out. Can I suggest that you ask your friends to stop telling you when they get calls about you? When you don't know, you don't get your hopes up...

atararox

Dating Pro

Posts: 227
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

thanks guys!! yes Hashem is saving me since when i do go out im always the one to say no and that can be really annoying too and it is emotionally draining. i dont think i give a different impression than i really am but how would i know? and also my friends dont tell me every time they get a call but their always like "i get a zillion calls about you"....and then just random people tell me they get calls about me...oysh!

Smile91

Dater

Posts: 23
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

Yeh, I totally know how you feel, it definitely is annoying when ppl. tell you they got calls bt. you. then nothing happens, especially when they tell you that the caller sounded so nice and would make such a good mother-in-law, or they mention the name and that the boy is so good. The thing is that ppl. think that they're being nice and want you to feel good that ppl. are thinking bt. you.....but ppl. should definitely think before they tell you bt. all the calls they get.

Avigail

Dating Maven

Posts: 130
Send Message
Post Re: Why doesnt anyone wanna go out with me!?!

smile 91 I couldn't agree with you more. I think it's absolutely horrible when girls tell you that someone called them. The worst part is when they tell you the questions they asked. Then you start getting nervous bec. why did they ask those questions and what must they have heard of and what are they like..... And for all they know they could of messed up the shidduch!!!!!!!
Just an example that just came to mind a girl told me that a mother asked if I always wear makeup, I wish she wouldn't have told me. Or lets say she asked what size dress she is. Don't you think that could effect her relationship with her mo in law later on???? Cmon everyone just keep it to yourself.

Pages: [1]
Mingle Forum by cartpauj
Version: 1.0.33.3; Page loaded in: 0.146 seconds.