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Author Topic: cool/funny poem
todarabbah

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Posts: 36
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Post cool/funny poem
on: January 27, 2014, 10:39 PM

It’s a boy’s world, you know
By: An anonymous single

You've gotta settle, stop being so choosy, it's a boy's world after all
And you're just one of the millions who think their worth something, have the gall
You've got to start looking better, so that you'll be noticed when you walk the street
And perhaps you can lose a few pounds too, so you'll be a better piece of meat.

'Tis a boys market, you know, so stop being such a case
Fess up and accept the reality that you're being forced to face
You can't just tell a shadchan "no" because the guy's very bummy
For it's the reality that all girls are gold while all the guys are crummy.

Shadchan after shadchan tells you this, their words sting like an open wound
Your hopes of ever finding Mr. Right for you, suddenly shattered and ruined
Their conversations were so similar, that they all seem like one big blur
And the sad reality is that your parents seem to side with him or her

They convince you to at least try to date him, with no "ifs" "ands" or "buts"
So what if he's missing a screw or two so what if he's completely nuts?
So what if he recalculates his every move, so what if he's weird and nerdy?
So what if he looks disheveled, his hair all loose his suits all dirty ?

It's a boys world you know, and girls come a dozen a dime
So you have be on your best behavior always and graduate college on time
You have to do everything right, from high school, to work-life to sem
You always have to look great at weddings and portray yourself as a gem

You always have to act nicely to people, you always have to act stable
You can never act moody, or vent, but rather have to empower and to enable
You have to act sweet and happy, and if you're not, you just have to pretend
Otherwise, how on earth do you expect your singlehood to ever end?

Yet he can do as he wishes and pleases, and nobody says a peep
He can sit around and klutz all day, and arise at 12PM after sleep
He can flunk out of school and take his time with things because there's simply no rush for guys
Despite how completely messed up he turns out to be, they'll be flocking to him like flies.

Because it's just a boys world you know, so he can act like a jerk
Date hundreds of women and live it up, and then dump them for every quirk
He can still be warming the bench in Yeshiva, and so what if he's 24?
There will somehow still be a million girls lined up knocking on his door

Hang out in the coffee room till 12AM comparing chock-full to Nescafe
Daven three times without a minyan and not go to shul all day
He's few and far between, you know, so why should he bother to try?
He'll be easy to marry off anyway for his chromosome is XY.

It's a boys world, so I better get used to it, for I'm a mere commodity
Valued by how many thousands my parents will give if he so chooses to marry me
Perhaps I may be a top girl, but I'm defective merchandise nonetheless
Simply because I'm not wearing pants but instead put on a skirt or a dress.

So what if I'm pretty and fun to be around, so what if I'm in Columbia law?
So what if I come from the most charming family and can make the prettiest cakes you ever saw
So what if I have the best track record, while his is far less than great?
He's one of those hard-to-find Yeshiva bochrim, so I better accept the date

So what if he appears to be obnoxious, wants to marry a slave to him, get a free ride
So what if his ego's humongous, and nothing can ever shatter his pride
So what if he looks like a monkey, and is 4'11 and rates a Tanner II
So what if he takes his life easy and parties, as though he's got nothing better to do.

So what if he has no masculinity, and you would quiver as much as you'd dread
The mere thought of being in the same room with him, let alone in the same bed.
So what if he tells you a 19 year old is inherently hotter than someone older
And makes you feel worthless on dates, while constantly looking over his shoulder

You still should feel privileged that he wants you, because you're living in a crisis
And every girl in this wicked world has got to make some sacrifices
Or else she'll wind up an old maid like the many that exist
Without a ring ever placed on her finger, or an engagement bracelet on her wrist.

I might as well become a transgender, for then at least my shidduch life would be alive
And I'd even be considered the taller of the bunch, after all, I'm a real 5'5"!
Or else I'll have to accept things the way they are, or I'll never become a wife
So I better get used the fact, and grow up, because that's a girl's lot in life

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