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Author Topic: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
feigy123

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Post Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 2:24 PM

This is inspired by this thread.

I went to therapy and it was very helpful. I'm really glad I did. It took me 4 tries before I found someone who was good, and after I switched cities, I tried 2 others who were also useless, so I'm batting 1/6. Still, it was worth all the hunting and finding to find that one, because I really feel like a different person as a result. It's a different life.

And it isn't just the things you work through together; you come out with the tools and ability to keep applying it and have deeper insights into yourself. It was worth every cent (and it was a whole lot of those cents).

patcha

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 2:36 PM

I'm so glad someone posted this.

I went through some normal, but challenging times as a teen, and went to therapy. It was very helpful. I also had to try different therapists before I found one that was compatible with me.

Like feigy mentioned, you develop tools and coping skills, and after a couple of years, I no longer needed it on a regular basis, although I still do work on those issues. It really did make me a better person; more self-aware, able to deal with challenges, and secure. I'm so happy my parents didn't listen to all the people worried about shidduchim since I didn't really "need" it.

Quote from feigy123 on July 17, 2013, 2:24 PM
And it isn't just the things you work through together; you come out with the tools and ability to keep applying it and have deeper insights into yourself. It was worth every cent (and it was a whole lot of those cents).

Exactly.

chaykie

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 3:12 PM

yes, pretty recently actually. so, i tried social workers, and i hate social workers...no offense if anyone on this site is one...i don't like the way they look you in the face, i dunno the ones i had rubbed me the wrong way, so i ended up going to a frum psychologist to ask him my questions, even tho i don't really need a psychologist- but hey, if i like him and he's willing to answer my questions, that's what i'm gonna do.

feigy123

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 3:17 PM

Quote from chaykie on July 17, 2013, 3:12 PM
yes, pretty recently actually. so, i tried social workers, and i hate social workers...no offense if anyone on this site is one...i don't like the way they look you in the face, i dunno the ones i had rubbed me the wrong way, so i ended up going to a frum psychologist to ask him my questions, even tho i don't really need a psychologist- but hey, if i like him and he's willing to answer my questions, that's what i'm gonna do.

I think I did 3 social workers and 3 psychologists.

Definitely they need to be frum though. Otherwise they completely don't understand the problems frum people have.

chaykie

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 4:40 PM

i guess having a frum one depends. one that i had was jewish- nowhere near anything close to frumkeit...but because the organization deals with frum ppl all the time, they were trained specially- by a frum social worker here who is very accepted- regarding the life of a frum girl our age. but if what you need is not really related to yiddishkeit, i guess it doesn't matter if ur therapist is frum or not.

feigy123

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 4:42 PM

Sure. But I doubt any frum person has an issue which is not somehow related to yidishkeit, either directly or tangentially.

patcha

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 4:54 PM

Quote from feigy123 on July 17, 2013, 4:42 PM
Sure. But I doubt any frum person has an issue which is not somehow related to yidishkeit, either directly or tangentially.

That's a very good point.

hittheroof

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 4:58 PM

What happens when your dealing with your issues and Yom Tov comes around or family simchas etc... Usually wtvr your issue your dealing with becomes more tensed since your not on your daily routine..
How can a non jewish therapist really understand the pressure of these outside factors?!?!

chaykie

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 5:04 PM

true feigy123, a lot of issues do somehow tie in to yiddishkeit. but sometimes it's friendship/relationship issues (like mine were, so that's the only example i could think of right now) and anyone can help you with that. the reason i stopped going to the ppl i went to had nothing to do with the fact that they couldn't understand me, it was just because i didn't like them! and the one i like happens to be frum, which is very nice.

daysfan24

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 6:41 PM

I have been and it helped tremendously - my friend who works at a doctors office told me ( not names) that you'd be surprise who goes to therapy. And everyone can for sure benefit from it. I am happy I went and it doesn't identify me in anyway. And it certainly shouldn't be a negative thing, even though it is viewed that way by some.

thinkingBY-
girl

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 17, 2013, 7:17 PM

Quote from hittheroof on July 17, 2013, 4:58 PM
What happens when your dealing with your issues and Yom Tov comes around or family simchas etc... Usually wtvr your issue your dealing with becomes more tensed since your not on your daily routine..
How can a non jewish therapist really understand the pressure of these outside factors?!?!

A nonfrum therapist may not be able to truly understand that, but is your issue really revolving around that? If the reason why you're seeking help is inherently wrapped up in Yiddishkeit/Frumkeit then you'd be best to see a frum therapist. If that isn't the case though, many nonfrum therapists are culturally competent enough to be aware of this fact that they aren't necessarily able to relate to everything you describe and be able to help you anyway.

basmelech

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 18, 2013, 12:12 AM

I went to a therapist after going through a difficult time in my life. It helped me tremendously.
Here's a good comparison.
If someone gets a bad cut they go to a dr. to help heal it. If someone needs heart surgery they have to go to a heart surgeon to help them. Its not embarassing to say I just had surgery or I went to the dr. But what happens when someone gets bullied for years or they are socially unaccepted? Isn't that considered a "cut" in the emotional/brain dptmt? They need a dr. just as badly if not more than someone who got a physical cut. Its Ok and understandable. And what happens when someone goes through a trauma? They need a "surgeon" for the brain just as badly if not more than someone who needs hearta surgery.
And what about plain old regular health visits to the dr. Everyone should also make a health visit to a social worker. The brain/emotions of a person should be checked on. After all its very important, as much as, if not more than our physical aches and pains.
Thanks to H-shems kindness in helping me find a wonderful social worker, I was able to overcome and grow from my challenge. 🙂

sem613

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Post Re: Have you been to therapy? Did it help you?
on: July 18, 2013, 2:20 PM

i went to a therapist briefly because a teacher of mine was worried about how stressed i was and suggested it. unfortunately my parents (i was under 18 at the time) chose the psychologist, who they thought would be the perfect fit as she was a frum woman, but it ended up being a disaster as she didn't fully understand my hashkafic views on what i was taking on to do

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